Liv was gone for 5 days last week and I had the house to myself, something that rarely happens for either of us. I had really good intentions to get all the laundry done and clean our room and work in the yard while she was gone, and I did all that, but I was struck by fine line I walked between total chaos and cluttered disarray throughout the week.
With no one home but me and the cats, we were all able to spread out a little bit more. I work from home and with only me in the house, I often choose to spread out on the kitchen table. My spread grew increasingly larger each day Liv was gone. It started simply enough, with the computer and a notebook and grew to magazines, the checkbook, a dirty plate from lunch and three empty glasses, not to mention the baked bean stains and crumbs from breakfast.
I knew I should make the effort to tidy things up, but with only me around I just got lazy. For dinner one night I grilled a lone hot dog and ate potato chips, not a green vegetable in site. On Sunday morning I had breakfast with my Dad and Johnny and smothered my french toast in what I thought was powdered sugar, only to find out after my first mouthful that it was actually flower-YUCK!
The point is, in the years I have been with Liv I have said many times that being with her has "been good for me." And I mean that, but what never occurred to me before this weekend was the notion that perhaps I would be less of a person without her (she just yelled at me from the bathroom to remind me that the bathroom needs cleaned).
This isn't one of my "Low Self Esteem" moments, I don't mean to say I would not still be a good person without her, but somehow this weekend I just realized that she helps me be my better self. Lots of people aid me in that quest, but she gets some big props in that department and as we approach 5 years together I am starting to realize that some of what replaces the hype and thrill of a new relationships is really worth waiting around for.
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