Monday, July 06, 2009

Fowl Language

Do not talk about chickens or other birds when riding in the van.

Sunday, February 22, 2009

Time and the River

Audio documentary only...there are no images here.

Monday, December 22, 2008

Cube Chronicles: Sightings

Present time: 8:36 a.m.
Arrival time: 8:07 a.m.
Xmas sweater sightings: 3
People sightings: 4
Ratio of Xmas sweater to people: 1 sweater to 1.3 persons
State of Affairs: Sad

Thursday, December 11, 2008

Cube Chronicles: Soap Opera

OK Folks, you asked for it. The return of the Cube Chronicles. If I get fired, I hope you'll give me housing and feed me. Enjoy and know that this is all true. Nothing has been altered except the names of the Soap Ladies (of course, they would insist on anonymity). This is a long post, but worth reading because it is so freaking unbelievable.

One of the first emails regarding soap collection from December 2007:

To the 105 women who share the 6th Floor Restroom:
It's time again to collect for restroom supplies for the 6th floor women's restroom. The collection envelope will be on the OHDAP door all week. Last month we collected $37.00; which didn't carry us through the entire month as we ran out of soap around the 3rd week of the month. If everyone would try to donate at least .50 cents it will allow us to provide hand soap for the entire month. Thanks to everyone who was so generous last month.
Soap lady #1

My environmentally conscious reply:
HI Soap Lady #1,

I appreciate all the work you all are doing to keep the restroom in a fresher state, and I have one suggestion for you. With thoughts of the environment and waste in mind, would you consider buying liquid soap in bulk and refilling the plastic containers? The soap refills would probably be cheaper than always buying individual bottles. I am not sure you can get refills for the brands you are buying right now, but I know you can get bags of refills at Target with their Method line (they have nice scents like lavender, etc.) If you consider that idea and want help with the refilling, I would be happy to take on that role.

Anyway, that’s my two cents.
Have a good day and thanks again for organizing this effort,
(After Note: I got no response back and have been given the cold shoulder by these lovely ladies ever since)

The Soap Collection Saga Begins Again (on November 4, 2008 mind you, the date of one of the most important elections in history) :
Hello everyone it is that time again, to collect money or soap for the 6th floor women’s restroom; the envelope will be taped to the OHDAP door near the elevators and the soap box will be at the entrance of the door. Thanks to everyone who contributes. So far we have only collected $9.00 and no soap at all; just a friendly reminder we are only collecting until Friday.

Reply from XXXX:
Since everyone is sharing their sentiments on the bathroom soaps, I’d like to share mine.
Firstly, I’d like to personally Thank Soap Lady #1 and Soap Lady #2 for even TRYING to make our bathroom experience a pleasant one. For I’ve gone in there to many times and had to just turn around in disgust for the odor, or just the plain uncleanliness of the place. Soiled toilet seats, paper towels on the floor, sanitary napkins behind the toilet seats, and often wonder if WOMEN are using this bathroom. Because women are mostly more clean then men.

Now, I’m not trying to offend anyone, BUT if you don’t want to contribute, then don’t. If you don’t want to use the products, don’t. If you don’t want to use the bathroom on this floor period, then don’t. BUT, I’d like to go in there and NOT have to hold my breath or search out another bathroom.

Once again, for those of us who appreciate your efforts, THANK YOU Soap Lady #2 and Soap Lady # 1!!

Reply from Soap Lady #2
Soap Lady # 1 and I initially thought of the idea to supply the women’s bathroom with hand soap and other items, simply because of the daily condition of the 6th floor bathroom. There were many a day that one or both of us walked in to the bathroom only to have to turn right around and seek out another one on a different floor. The odor was appalling. Women leave their tampons on the back of the toilet seats, urinate on the toilet seat as well as the surrounding floor area and leave it for the next person to clean up. When we tried adding a few baskets of potpourri to the bathroom, we found them on the floor, potpourri scattered. I refuse to have to hold my breath to use the bathroom!! At last count, there were 105 women on the 6th floor……that’s a lot of women using one bathroom. Just do your part to help keep it in a sanitary condition. Have some respect.

I thank Soap Lady # 1 for taking the time and energy to collect for the bathroom soaps, drive to the store to buy the soap (many times using her own money to be able to buy the amount of soaps that we need for the month) and carry 30 - 40 bottles of soap and renuzits to ODH once a month. The only goal in mind here was to make the 6th floor women’s bathroom a little more presentable and fresh.

So, to those of you who do not wish to participate in the soap collection…….don’t. Don’t use the soft soap, don’t give any money, don’t use the 6th floor bathroom and most of all, don’t thank Soap Lady #1 for trying to make your work day a more pleasant one!

Response from XXX:
Good morning everyone,
I think it is important to say that those of us who were satisfied just to use the soap provided by ODH were in no way implying that we don’t appreciate the efforts of others to make things nice. At least I can say that in my own behalf, and feel certain that others agree. If there is a need regarding that bathroom, perhaps we should take it up with whomever is the appropriate person or persons in the building & deal with it at the dept. level instead of trying to solve it among ourselves. No one need feel unappreciated as I’m sure that was not the intent.

Response from XYX:
I would agree with XXX. You cannot please everyone and just because a two people disagree on an action doesn’t imply any level of disrespect. It is what it is – and that is a choice.

I use the ODH provided soap and that is my choice. I use my own lotion and when the bathroom is terrible I go somewhere else.

I wish that some would be more responsible while using the public bathroom, but I realize that everyone wasn’t raised to do the right thing or to behave like a lady (have respect for themselves and others).

In closing, please remove my name from your distribution list and thank you for your thoughtfulness.

Response from Me (again, remember this was all happening on November 4th):
Soap Lady #1 and Soap Lady # 2,

You can take my name off the list too. Not because I don’t appreciate your efforts, but because all of these emails make me feel like I am in high school. This is more drama concerning our restroom than I care to hear about.

Thank you for everything you do and thank you for removing my name from the list.

What I really wanted to say was: “You freaks, try worrying about something more important that hand soap. How about collecting money for the homeless or a domestic violence shelter? JESUS.”

Wednesday, September 17, 2008


Hey crew, Lisa and I designed a shirt for the election this year. Check us out!

Tuesday, August 12, 2008

New stuff

Not surprisingly, DJ Tickles had a fan club before he dropped the first beat.
Lucky boy.

PS For the squinty-eyed, the shirts read 'DJ Tickles'


It's me going solo this week.
Sneak peeks include: Bell X1, Bon Iver and Melissa (California).

Thursday, July 24, 2008

DJ School

So 'Fresh at Liquid' is becoming a little bit of a DJ school.

Last night we had DJ Curious spinning hot tunes by the likes of Ben Harper, Nina Simone, The Brazilian Girls, etc.

Check her out:

Next week it's another mystery DJ, followed by this winner on August 6th.

Don't miss's sure to be SIZZLIN'